


Granny Stripes

by Parks and Fluff (GamblingDementor)



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Beer, Blankets, Cabins, Crochet, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Honeymoon, Mouse Rat, Music, Post-Wedding, Presents, Roommates, Sleep, Sleepy Cuddles, Wedding Night, Weddings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-30
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-03-26 13:13:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3852226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GamblingDementor/pseuds/Parks%20and%20Fluff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, all the comfort you need is a warm blanket and someone to share it with. Series of non-chronological one-shots/drabbles featuring Andy and April's domestic interactions throughout their lives. Centered around the home and blankets. </p><p>(This came from noticing a crocheted blanket on their couch in episode 3x12 and exploring where it might have come from, and what fluffy scenes could come with it. But other blankets are featured as well.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Wedding Night

It's so late that dawn is almost breaking by the time April decides that, even though her wedding party was the best ever, so much so that she has barely been bored at all most of the night, and she loves Andy, and she's so happy they're married, and there were even  _some_  guests she doesn't completely hate, and she's happy they were here, there simply is a limit to how long she can stand being in a room full of people.

 

"Andy, they have to leave," she tells him, and then louder, to the whole room,"YOU HAVE TO LEAVE, NOW!"

 

No one hears her over the music blasting through the speakers that has been deafening everyone ever since Mouse Rat stopped singing hours ago. She grabs Andy's arm and repeats herself with a slightly whiny voice.

 

"Andy..."

 

He's been lost in thoughts, looking around him at the party from the couch where they've been cuddling for the best part of the night, his face a huge grin that just won't fade, but he turns to her when she pulls on the arm he has wrapped around her shoulders.

 

"Yeah, babe?"

 

"Andy, make them leave."

 

"Who?"

 

"Everyone. Party's over."

 

He stares at her for a few seconds before cracking an even bigger smile.

 

"Dude, say no more. I know what's going on."

 

"You do?"

 

"Totally! You are so going to have the best wedding night EVER in like five minutes, I promise!"

 

She actually just wanted everyone gone, but it  _i_ _s_  their wedding night, so they might as well spend it having sex all over the house. She gives him a look that she hopes he would understand means  _I'd better_   _have the best wedding night_   _ever or I'm gonna divorce you_ , and suddenly Andy is up and going, trotting from one person to the other, whispering to everybody what she thinks is probably either a very sweet and polite way to kindly ask them to leave using far too many words, or a very gross plea to let him get laid with his wife. Either way, the guests that are here end up leaving them alone and she doesn't even have to yell them out — she still does, just a little bit.

 

She turns the music off. No guests, no roommate, the house's all empty, save for the two of them, just her  _husband_  and her. A smile creeps onto her face unbidden, and she doesn't mind. She pops a few chips into her mouth right as Andy is waving the last guests goodbye, hums Sex Hair to herself and sits back on the couch, waiting for him.

 

Five minutes later, she's still alone on the couch, it's starting to get chilly (Andy didn't pay the bills again, which is fine by her, except it's always pretty cold in here, especially as winter is coming. The guests were their heating that night, and Andy her personal heater, but they're gone and she's all alone and freezing right now), she wants a night of amazingly weird sex with her husband and she's grumpy he's taking so long.

 

"Andy!"

 

No answer. She wraps a blanket around her shoulders, shivering, and walks up the door to find him chatting with his grandma as if he's completely forgotten that it's their wedding night. It's dark, a chilly wind is blowing, and April frowns.

 

"No, no, Grandma, I promise it's fine...", Andy is saying.

 

He's smiling like an idiot and she can't really be mad at him when he just looks so happy. Lifting his arm and wrapping it around her, she nestles herself against his side. Even in the cold night, he's still super hot and it's beyond her how he manages to not lose just about every exposed part of his body to frostbite.

 

"Andy, come back inside."

 

"Hey, babe, Grandma was just telling me she's sorry she didn't bring a gift, but I told her..." 

 

Her teeth are chattering and she kind of tunes him out for a second. He's still all smile. The old woman takes April's hand into hers and squeezes it as old people do. April jerks it back, but Andy's grandma doesn't seem to take notice.

 

"I'm really sorry, I wish I had something nice for you and my boy, but I didn't know it was a wedding before tonight..."

 

"Yeah, yeah, great, goodbye," April says and tugs on Andy's arm and  _oh my god he's still wearing the Wayne jersey yet his skin is so hot, how is he not_  freezing?

 

"Bye, Grandma!" he shouts as April drags him back inside, "I love you!"

 

She slams the door shut before hearing the answer and grabs his neck to kiss him and very soon, the blanket falls off her shoulders and he makes her forget about ever being cold.  


	2. Lake Michigan

Andy has no experience whatsoever in honeymoon trips, but as far as theirs is concerned, he's pretty sure it's going totally perfectly.

 

The first day, they arrive at Burly's family cabin (in a car April borrowed or stole from God knows who because hers broke and Andy doesn't currently "own" a car) and, after half an hour of search, they eventually find a window that has been left a little bit open, just a quarter of an inch, and thanks to April's tiny fingers, they open it all the way up. She climbs into the house and quickly finds a spare key under the doormat (she's  _so_  smart, Andy always thinks) to open the front door and let him in. He's pretty sure Burly's family wasn't planning on taking a week off right now, but if they do, April will totally figure something out. They spend that first day making out − and a little bit more than making out, they're  _married_  after all −on the couch and Andy still feels all warm inside all the time thinking about it, about her. He's still getting used to wearing a wedding ring, to feeling that tiny bit of metal on her own ring finger, and it just keeps reminding him that he's  _married_  to the coolest chick in the world. Perfect first honeymoon day with the perfect wife? Yes yes yes.

 

There's a lot to do at a lake house, but very little that April is actually into, so they spend most of their time there either napping or hanging out or watching the fire in the hearth since there's no tv (which Andy finds relaxing and cool and April boring and pointless), having sex on just about every surface of the house (April is  _very_  creative when it comes to that), using all the dishes and putting them on the floor everywhere (her idea) and swimming in the lake (his idea − April is  _so_  pretty in a swimsuit). They have a lot of fun all in all. If Andy knew that this lake house was as great as it is, he would have broken into it long before. Well, not that long, really. He has only been with April for a month, after all. For a second, he wishes they'd get their own cabin so they could have a quiet little nook in case they want some peace just the two of them, but he shakes that thought off. They'd never get the money. Lucky they have Burly's house.

 

At some point, Andy decides he wants to make the best of their stay in such a beautiful location and go do something outside. It's not like they're going to take a vacation again any time soon, considering they're broke as hell. April refuses to go hiking or fishing (which is just as well, considering Andy has no idea how to fish and just suggested the idea because it sounded cool), but compromises by agreeing to try waterskiing later.

 

Waterskiing is a complete disaster, and yet Andy has the time of his life. He has never driven a boat before, and after a whole day driving one, he still has no idea how to do, but it's just  _so much fun_. April doesn't know how to waterski either, despite his best advice. She falls so many times that he's starting to wonder if she's doing it on purpose. He has to laugh every time, too, because her hair is tied up in a way that makes her look like an angry cat every time she comes out of the water and it looks like she's about to hiss. They take turns a few times and he isn't much better than her − she says he looks like a dog and he growls and barks and she laughs when he bites at her calves. The weather is fair in the afternoon, but as time goes by, it's starting to get a little bit chilly and he doesn't really want to swim anymore. They make out in the boat, but in the end, she's shivering and it's starting to get dark, so he takes her in his arms, literally bridal style because she was his bride like last week, and takes her back inside.

 

He did have fun splashing around in the lake, driving the boat a tad too fast and spitting water at her, but it's even more fun taking a bath together in Burly's huge bathroom (which, what is he doing with a tub that size in a wood cabin in the first place? Why?) for hours before eventually April complains about the water being cold  _again_ ,  _like why did they even leave the lake if they just stayed in the bath until it's freezing, Andy, we have to get out of here_ , but he loves grumpy April too because he gets to cheer her up every time.

 

"Babe, you're gonna feel so hot right now, I swear, it'll be just like a faucet."

 

"Furnace," she corrects him, but she's smiling already.

 

Maybe it's the booze April found after breaking through the pantry door, maybe it's the smell of the fire that reminds him of long camping nights with his brothers when he was a kid, maybe it's all the sex they had on Burly's couch (also crazy comfortable, they should really come back to this cabin again, it's the  _best_ ), maybe it's the bacon and pancakes they gorged themselves with afterwards, maybe it's the warmth of his super dope wife's tiny body covering his as they cuddle under a blanket, but Andy can't think of a better night in his whole life than this one. He can't remember a time he's ever felt more completely relaxed.

 

"I know we should totally, like, go to bed right now," he mumbles, "but I just..."

 

"I'm gonna break your knees if you move," she interrupts and nestles her head right under his neck. Her lips brush against his skin, soft as a feather, and he wraps his arms around her even tighter. He's not quite sure because it's raining outside and he can't really hear that well, but he thinks she just let out that sort of moan that he only gets to hear when she's super comfortable and happy and safe, and he likes that, because he only gets to hear that when they cuddle late at night and she's almost asleep (come to think of it, could it be a snore? He's not sure), and he wants her to be happy around him as much as he is around her.

 

"I love you," she sighs and that's no mistake, she's said it loud enough. "My husband."

 

"Love you too," he replies and yawns. "So, so much..."

 

His only response is the quiet breathing of his kickass wife sleeping.

 

The next day, he wakes up to the sounds of rain slashing on the window and of rustling and tiptoeing around. He rubs his eyes, forces them open in all his sleepiness and finds his beautiful wife pacing across the room, picking things up and shoving them into her backpack.

 

"Hey, babe."

 

She turns to him and gives him the cutest smile, a bit crooked, her  _I-just-did-something-wrong_  smile which is like his third favorite April smile after her sexy  _drop-your-pants-right-now_  smile and her special  _I-hate-everyone-but-I-love-you_  smile.

 

"Hey."

 

"Watcha doing?"

 

She looks up from a pile of books she's been stacking in her bag and her smile gets broader.

 

"Helping Burly away with things he doesn't need."

 

"Seriously?!" He stands up, all tiredness gone. "What did you got?"

 

She looks at the bag, then at him, then at the bag again and begins listing everything. He walks up to her and hugs her from behind and her melting into his embrace, holding his arms makes him all giddy and happier than all the stuff that she's stolen and that is theirs now.

 

"... and this flashlight, and the lavender shampoo that smells good, and this pack of..."

 

He stops her with a kiss, and an hour later, when they're all sweaty and worn out on the floor after the best sex they've had so far (sometimes it feels that they're getting better every time), she also steals the blanket from the sofa, the one that's super soft.

 

Andy is the one who brings up Leslie and convinces April to send her a video. April is less than ecstatic when she finds out that they had a working network connection all along, but he laughs it off and they still send the video to Leslie (they accidentally film twenty minutes of making out and a little bit of foreplay but he trusts April to cut that part). They still watch tons of Netflix after that, or at least they put it on, and at some point they forget about it and jump each other's bones.

 

When they pack up their stuff and all the stuff they stole at the end of their honeymoon, Andy sort of wishes they'd stayed here longer. April notices he's sad and offers him to pretend they stayed a week longer, and stay at home instead eating take-outs and wearing nothing at all, and Andy realizes their honeymoon is never really going to be over.


	3. Crochet Stripes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April's back from her honeymoon and Leslie has a present for her.

April is just coming back from Andy's shoeshine stand, bracing herself for a few hours of checking her mails, watching videos of puppies on YouTube and glancing at Ron through the window and nodding from time to time before finally leaving for home early, when Leslie appears in front of her out of thin air.

 

 

"April!" she says, loudly, and April winces.

 

 

"Hey."

 

 

The other woman is literally beaming so much April's kind of afraid her cheeks will stretch and stay stuck that way, or tgat it hurts. She drags her along the hall, blabbering about things April does not quite get — or care to listen to. Why would she listen if she can just daydream about the big man she left in the hall — she is going to take several long coffee-slash-make-out breaks with him today.

 

 

"So what I'm saying is I'm so sorry."

 

 

They're in Leslie's office by now and April finds herself wondering how they ended up here. Her legs seemed to be working of their own accord. She's still only thinking about Andy's warm body against hers in the water of Lake Michigan, about his big hands on her hips and his lips on her neck. She shuts the thoughts out begrudgingly to focus on Leslie just for a while.

 

 

"What for?"

 

 

Leslie tries to give her a knowing look, but April has no idea what she means. She opens her briefcase and pulls out a big present wrapped in blue paper with a fancy bow on top.

 

 

"For the wedding. Your wedding. I thought I knew better than you, but since you're obviously very happy together, I  _suppose_  I was  _wrong,_ " she sighs the last word.

 

 

"Oh, that."

 

 

April was actually touched by Leslie's concern that night, to the point of  _hugging_  her (gosh, what had become of her?), but she appreciates the apology as well. Especially if it comes with a big box of free stuff. Maybe it's food. They could use some free food.

 

 

"It's okay," she says, after she realizes Leslie's been staring at her nervously. "It's totally fine."

 

 

Leslie gives her the brightest smile and April almost feels like smiling, too. Leslie has this ability to make her want to be  _nice_ , sometimes. She worried for nothing, still. She would have married Andy no matter what (she'd marry him a ten thousand times more if she could), and no one's opinion on that really mattered, but if she had to be perfectly honest, she doesn't completely mind having Leslie's approval. It does mean at least a little bit to her.

 

 

"Great!" Leslie cheers. "I'm happy to hear that!"

 

 

April shrugs and gives half a glance at the present still on Leslie's desk. It doesn't go unnoticed.

 

 

"This," Leslie says emphatically and pushed it towards April, "is for you and Andy. It'll fit right into the color theme of the living room at your friend's house, from what I saw the day of the wedding, hopefully it'll still look good in your new place. I hope you've started looking?"

 

 

She nods for April to open the present, but April waits.

 

 

"Actually, we had a fight to death with Burly in our wrestling ring yesterday. We won and buried him on Ann's front lawn. The house is ours now."

 

 

"I know you're messing with me," Leslie says with a judging but still benevolent look, "and I don't know what happened, but hopefully, nothing illegal. Now open it!"

 

 

April knows that, ideally, she should have asked Andy to come open the present, because he loves unwrapping stuff and playing with the paper afterwards, but Leslie is staring at her so intently that she feels like she has no other choice than do it herself right now. She tears the paper and pulls out what's inside.

 

 

"It's a… blanket?"

 

 

"YES!"

 

 

Leslie begins to clap and cheer and April doesn't really have the heart to comment.

 

 

"Are you happy? I crocheted it myself last night!"

 

 

"Erm, yeah, sure," April shrugs.

 

 

"I mean, I know the pattern is a little basic, I wish I'd had time for something a bit more intricate, maybe a picture of you two, but stripes are always elegant, and I think it'll fit right into your house, don't you? I wasn't  _completely_  sure about the colors, I mean, I think your favorite color is black, but I didn't know about Andy, so I chose colors that look like the murals because how can you go wrong with that, and that remind me of your living room, and pastel goes with black anyway, so you can just put it on your couch and then…"

 

 

Some day, April will have to comment on Leslie's rambling and let her know that everyone stops listening to a word she says after three seconds, but less talking for Leslie would probably mean more working for April and she doesn't want that.

 

 

"It's great, Leslie, thanks," she mumbles as fast as she can before leaving Leslie's office with the blanket and puts it into her bag before starting her computer. She has videos of cute puppies falling asleep to watch for a reasonable amount of time before going back to the shoeshine stand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so in episode 3x12 we see a crocheted blanket with granny stripes in beautiful light tones, and I got a bit ahead of myself making up where it came from (with the help of opti), and my headcanon is that Leslie gave it to them. From now on, unless mentioned otherwise, every time a blanket is mentioned in this fic, so every chapter, it WILL be this blanket. Here is a picture of it : http://i.imgur.com/NKDJkG4.jpg


	4. Sleepy Wife

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April's sleeping, Andy's not.

"This bed is like, a million times better than the couch, right, babe?"

She grunts in response. Lying on her side, her naked back to him under the covers that she's bunching up around her with her messy hair and quiet breathing, she looks like exactly the sight he wants to fall asleep to every single night for ever and ever.

"Like, totally better," he goes on when it becomes obvious that she isn't going to answer, "I'm so glad Burly moved out."She grumbles something under her breath. She  _can_  be a bit grouchy when she's sleepy at night, he found out early into their relationship. Or when she's just woken up. Or in the middle of the day. Any time, really. She's adorable."I mean, he was the one paying the bills," he thinks out loud and hugs her from behind. Her skin is soft against his hands and her hair smells like sex. With a tired moan, she slightly arches into him like a cat (a beautiful,  _beautiful_  sexy naked cat) and he guesses she might be falling asleep soon. "But still, we get the house for ourselves."

"Mmh, sure," she says in a sleepy sigh and turns around in his arms. Her head rests on his shoulder, fits right into him, as they always do, the two of them. "You're warm."He supposes he should sleep at some point, too, but he's feeling just so damn happy that his brain refuses to shup up. Sometimes he has these moments, when he thinks about how perfect his life is. Cool job as shoeshinist, cool house, cool boss (he isn't completely sure who  _is_  his boss but he thinks it's Chris and Chris is super duper cool) and, of course, the coolest overall best freaking wife in the universe, no, in all the universes ever."I love you  _so much_ ," he says because that thought is constantly on his mind and sometimes he just has to let it out. But when he glances down, April's fallen asleep and is already snoring, that cute little snores she makes that are just heavy breathing really, but he still teases her about it. At least he knows the conversation part is over for tonight.He has no idea what he's done to deserve this, to be so happy with her, but he knows that he's not wasting it. He's living it to the fullest. There's no way he is going to ever stop working full time to make his perfect wife happy. She's perfect and sleeping beautifully right now and that gives him an idea for a song. Slowly, with all the care in the world, he disentangles himself from her and stands up quietly. He can't help pressing a kiss on her temple before leaving the room, and she whimpers just a little bit, in the cutest way, in her sleep, but thankfully doesn't wake up.In the kitchen, he grabs himself a beer and checks the time on the wall. 12:30 am. He is definitely going to be tired tomorrow, but since he can't sleep, he might as well put his time to good use. Besides, he can always take a nap at work tomorrow. Or even a sexy nap with April, but that might defeat the purpose of getting some sleep.The house is quiet this late at night and for a second, Andy almost sings out loud to hear how it would in the silence but he remembers just in time that April's sleeping. He's going to have to be quiet when he starts writing that song, just after drinking his beer. He already has the title:  _Sleepy wife_. Another great track for  _April Ludgate is the best ever_. He takes a big sip of beer and sits on the couch, but feels something weird under him. 

 

It's a present. The paper is already torn and the content has been put back hastily inside, but it's clearly a present, probably for him and April, and there is a note in it.

 

_To my favorite couple, April and Andy,_

 

_I wish you the best life together, the happy and fulfilling life you both deserve. You two were made for each other and it's been one of my greatest joys to witness your love blossom. I hope this small gift gets you through the coldest nights, but the warmest comfort is being at home with the people you love._

  


_I love you both. Congratulations on the wedding. It was beautiful._

 

_Leslie Knope_

_Parks Department_

 

 

Inside, there is a blanket. It's soft and pretty, like everything Leslie makes, and Andy feels a huge smile plastered on his face at once. He always thought Leslie was rooting for them, but he feels blessed to read it plainly anyway. That blanket is beautiful. He wasn't exactly expecting any wedding gift, not from her, not from anyone (his mom gave him a set of new flanel shirts and a new dishwasher, and also made him his favorite meal the day after the wedding, and it's actually a lot coming from her, because she hasn't been doing that much ever since he's lost his father, but she's his  _mom_ , of course she'd give her little boy something for his wedding), so it comes as the best kind of surprise: surprise gifts. Also great are surprise parties and surprise sex.

 

"Andy?" 

 

He scrambles to his feet, the blanket still in his hand, as soon as he hears her voice. April's sitting up in bed, rubbing her eyes, and seems oddly relieved when she sees him.

 

"Hey, babe, what's up?"

 

She groans and her voice is still a bit slurred from sleep.

 

"I woke up and didn't see you and I just…"

 

"Hey, hey," he's immediately at her side, hugging her, and she presses into him, holding him tight. "I was just in the living room cause I couldn't sleep, babe, that's it. I'm here now."

 

"Mmh… I'm cold…"

 

He rubs her back and she's so tiny and precious when she's like this that it makes his wedding vows of protecting her all the more meaningful. Suddenly writing  _Sleepy wife_  seems very unimportant, and caring for his actual sleepy wife seems like the most important thing in the whole world. Wrapping the gift blanket around April, and their comforter, and the blanket they stole from Burly's family house (Burly never even noticed they had it), he gets her as warm and comfortable as he can.

 

"There you are!" he says, all chipper, "Super comfy and nice!"

 

She grabs his arm and pulls on it, and even though he's vastly stronger than her, he still gets the meaning and lies down beside her under the covers.

 

"I'm gonna turn you into a demon zombie if you go now."

 

Her arms locked around his neck, she's looking straight into his eyes and pretending to be a witch again.

 

"Wouldn't dream of it," he says and gives her a kiss before she closes her eyes and nestles herself against his shoulder, ready to fall back asleep any second.

 

The song will definitely wait until tomorrow to be written.


	5. Sniffer Creeper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben finds out Leslie gave Andy and April a blanket. The hard way.

April doesn't like Ben. She doesn't exactly hate him either − at least not more than she does everyone else − but she has no fondness for him. He has nothing that makes him special in her eyes and she holds no friendly admiration for him like she does for Leslie or even Ron (and will deny even to her deathbed). They barely talk when it's just the two of them at home, and she likes it that way. In fact, she generally ignores his existence.

But there are things you can't not react to when you come home to them."Dude, were you  _smelling_  that blanket right now?"If she cared more, she would take a picture of his face right now, maybe print it and paste it on every wall of City Hall. His mouth is gaping, his eyes wide open, he looks like a deer caught in headlights. Ridiculous. Strangely endearing, too."I… er, no! I mean, erm, what?  _What?_  No, I wasn't!" he blabbers and she snorts.  


"I just  _saw_  you, I'm literally standing like ten feet from you."

Not that she's coming any closer to a blanket sniffing weirdo. In fact, she gives him all the space he wants and gets herself a beer from the fridge. Andy is at band practice at Burly's new big house (she hopes he remembers to steal a few cool things like she told him to) and, if she's going to spend the night alone with Ben, she might as well make him as embarrassed as she can. It's like having a Jerry right at home.

She plops onto the kitchen stairs, takes a sip of beer, and meets his eyes again, trying to look as evenfaced yet still scary as she can. It has quite a bit of an effect: Ben's breathing hitches for a second and he throws the blanket as far away from him as she can."So, erm, Andy's at practice, huh? How about that?" he asks, contorting his body in ten trying-to-look-casual-but-really-looking-super-awkward positions before giving up and looking away from her, his hands on his lap."Yeah, he practices every week, I'm proud of him, bla bla bla, who cares, are you gonna tell me why you were sniffing Leslie's blanket right now?"At that, he turns back at her immediately. His face is all lit up, as if she's just told him the most important thing ever, given him the last piece of a jigsaw, and it looks frankly gross."So it  _was_  Leslie's blanket!"April pauses. The blanket is lying on the floor between them and they're both eying now. This might be the weirdest moment she's ever had with Ben. She can't fathom anyone having a crush on Leslie, weird annoying Leslie (except she really can, Leslie's awesome), but if Ben likes her, and she now feels pretty confident that he does, after witnessing what she just did, she's certain that there are better ways to process his feelings than what she's just walked in on.

 

"She gave it to us like a month ago, I doubt it smells like her anymore, dude," she sighs.

 

" _I know that!_ " he says a bit too quickly.

 

She ponders on what route to go from there.

 

"Look," she ends up saying in a far too gentle voice compared to the one she should use with a weirdo like him, "if you like Leslie, I don't think the best way to go about it is to go around sniffing the presents she gives to other people like a perv'."

 

" _I wasn't… it wasn't like that!_ " he hisses between gritted teeth, "I just… I thought it might have been…"

 

"I mean, I'm not  _judging,_  per se, Andy smells stuff lying around all the time, even your stuff."

 

Ben raises an eyebrow.

 

"Point is, it's kinda pathetic."

 

"That seemed unnecessary."

 

"Listen, I think at this point, your best option is to do what I did to get Andy. Blood sacrifice at every full moon."

 

"Right…"

 

She stands up, picks up the blanket, and sits on the couch next to Ben, pulling it over her lap. She can feel his stare when she turns on the TV.

 

"Don't look at me like that, you already reached your quota of creepiness for the night."

 

"I wasn't smelling it like some creep, okay? I just… Leslie mentioned that she liked needlework the other day, and I saw this blanket that, no offense, looks way too nice for you to have bought on your own, and I thought maybe it'd been a gift from her, so I had a look at it to make sure and…"

 

"Okay,  _fine_ , I don't care!"

 

"… Well, in any case, it didn't smell like her in the end."

 

"No shit."

 

"It's  _not_ a fetish, okay!" he says nervously, fidgeting with his fingers on the edge of the cushion. 

 

"If you say so."

 

"It's not!"

 

"Mmh."

 

"It's just, Leslie has this nice perfume and I thought that, if it was a gift from her, it'd have that smell, it's nothing weird!"

 

"Hey, Ben?"

 

"What?"

 

"I lost interest in that story like, three hours ago."

 

He grunts in response, glaring at her, and that actually makes her chuckle. She switches on Andy's Xbox and starts up her favorite zombie game. It makes her feel powerful.

 

"Wanna play?" she asks and regrets it instantly when he nods, still grumpy.

 

He seems to forget about the whole thing after a while, but that might be because she's kicking his ass at this game and he's just too upset to remember.

 

April hasn't forgotten anything, though, and when Andy comes home a couple hours later, she takes the blanket to their bedroom (it's starting to get chilly at nights again, even though they pay their bills almost every time now, so another blanket in bed is actually not a bad idea), she tells him all about Ben's crush and they laugh about it. Nothing strengthens a marriage like making fun of other people together.


	6. TV Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April is bored while watching TV and needs Andy to distract her.
> 
> Warning: this chapter is kind of bordering on M territory. Definitely not explicit at all, but a tiny bit more than T.

"Ugh, I hate this show, it's boring!"

 

April has been sighing and play punching Andy for quite some time now, complaining and being generally grumpy, and in response Andy has been hugging her and stroking her hair to soothe her, but it seems that she's had enough now.

 

"Aww, I'm sorry, babe."

 

He kisses her temple but she's still frowning. God, she's cute when she's all grouchy. He squeezes her into his arms and she breathes out what could be a giggle in better circumstances, but refuses to smile even if he knows she wants to because she loves his hugs, she's told him as much before.

 

"Mmh, I hate watching this," she sighs out, but something changes in her demeanor and Andy is pretty sure he's going to like this because suddenly she's whispering and that makes her sound kind of hot.

 

"Distract me."

 

Her voice is low, almost growling, and he knows this voice  _really_  well by now.

 

"Really, like, right here?" he glances to his right.

 

She nods with that smile of hers that drives him wild and there is no freaking way he's watching even one more second of these Doctor Who reruns if he can just look at his gorgeous sexy wife instead. She doesn't leave him any time to think and crashes her mouth against his in that forceful way he likes. She's all tongue and teeth and her fingers are gripping the back of his head just a bit too roughly.

 

"Babe…" he barely has the time to moan between kisses before she pushes on his shoulders to make him lie on the couch. The blanket is bunching all around them as she straddles him and it's getting far too hot but he doesn't mind. In the background, he can hear what sounds like an attack of the Daleks on screen but he will never dare look at it now, even though he really likes this nerdy show Ben has forced them into by watching it all day long. 

 

April is really getting him in the mood − not that it takes much. Her hips − she can do all sorts of amazing things with her body, but her hips grinding right on him have always been one of the best things ever about her. He's getting hard already and no clothes have even been shed off yet. People tell you something about the honeymoon phase, that it's always better at the beginning, but he's been with April for three whole months already and it's just as good now as it was the first time, the first day, the first minute. In fact, it's even getting better and better. She's perfect, or maybe not perfect but the fact that she isn't makes her perfect in a way, and she's  _the best_. 

 

Soon, the blanket lays forgotten on the floor because April threw it away before opening up his button down. Her lips found his neck and she bites him, and it's all he can do not to rip her clothes open and have his way with her right then and there. It's a wonder they even watched TV for so long when they could do their favorite thing in the world. She palms him through his pants and drags a moan out of him.

 

"Seriously, guys, you're just going to pretend I'm not here?"

 

It takes a full ten seconds for Andy to remember Ben. It probably doesn't help that April is nibbling on his neck and that she's pulled his zipper down − she's right on top of him so Ben can't see him, and Andy is kind of thankful for that.

 

"Babe," he breathes out, "babe, Ben is uncomfortable."

 

She looks up at him, resting her hands on his torso, and she's so light and tiny on him that he holds her close, his hands on her hips, because he loves her _so much_ he never wants to let go of her _._  She turns her head around and he can't see what her face looks like when she turns to Ben, but by the look of him, it's scary.

 

"Well, frankly, Ben, you should have thought of that before sitting there watching us."

 

Andy chuckles and she holds her hand for a high five, which he gives her. Ben sighs − he always sighs.

 

"I'm gonna go watch this in my room," he ends up saying and he sounds exasperated but Andy is far too gone to care right now. 

 

April's lips are locked on Andy's again even before Ben leaves the room. So much for watching TV together as roomies.


	7. Halloween Disaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Jack's thirteenth birthday and Sam is hiding in her parents' bedroom. There's just things you don't want to face in life.

"Sammy?"

 

The voice of her dad booms through the hall and she hides her face under the blanket and pretends she hasn't heard him.

 

"Sam? Where are you?"

 

She flattens herself on her parents' bed (she thought they would not go look for her there, but she was wrong − they  _always_  find her), trying to make herself as tiny as she can, and hopes he doesn't see her. His steps get closer and closer and she forgot if she closed the door or not before hiding inside the room. It's too risky to check.

 

"Samantha? You here, baby girl?"

 

"No…"

 

He laughs his big and loud laugh that she likes and, just like that, she feels a tiny little bit better.

 

"You don't know it, girl, but you just sold yourself."

 

She lets out an exasperated sigh and immediately claps her hands onto her mouth, but it's too late and she feels his weight on the bed right next to her. She didn't hear the door opening. Seems like she did not shut it after all.

 

"What happened there, Sam?" he asks and she hates that his voice is soft and soothing.

 

"I don't know what you're talking about," she mumbles and pulls the blanket off her face − not just to look at him and pretend she didn't do anything but also because it's getting pretty warm under here and she hates being warm. Or cold. Or upset, like she is right now.

 

He's looking right at her with his big eyes, the same that she has, but his are big and green and warm and they always smile even when his mouth doesn't. She looks away. Her heart is still tingling and the shame clenching her chest, but when he holds up his arms and she crawls onto his lap, it all gets a little bit lighter. His pirate costume is a little bit messy and smells like orange juice, but she doesn't mind that much.

 

"Come on, dude, you totally know what I'm talking about. The cupcakes, and the OJ, and…"

 

" _I don't wanna talk about it, Dad!_ " she hisses.

 

"Sorry…"

 

Why can't everything just be ignored? Why can't she just cuddle with her dad on her parents' bed and ignore what's wrong? His arms around her are warm and safe and she's starting to forget about what she's done when he speaks up again and ruins it all.

 

"Jack is a bit bummed, but I thought it was funny, kind of. I mean we'll laugh about it in like ten years. We'll all be like  _hey, remember that Halloween party when Sammy poured a full pitcher of orange juice on Jack and then threw the cupcake trays on the floor and ran away, it was awesome! She's so badass!_ "

 

She looks up at him and his grin is so wide she can feel the laughter on his lips that's waiting to come out.

 

"He was being dumb," she says right against his chest because she just wants to go back to the snuggles with  _no talking_.

 

"I mean, we're all kinda dumb, sweetie, sometimes."

 

"Yeah, but he was being super dumb."

 

His hands on her back are big and strong and warm and she doesn't want to go back to the lame party. Even her costume is dumb and lame and she hates it, all she wants to do is to stay here with him, or alone, and never see dumb Jack again in her life.

 

"He's super wet and sticky now. I tried to clean most of it off but I gotta say, you got him real good! He had to change out of his costume."

 

"He deserved that," she says and doesn't believe it.

 

Her dad laughs and hugs her closer, and for a while, she thinks she might laugh as well, but she can't. A question is burning her from the inside and she's afraid, no, terrified to ask it, but she knows that if she doesn't, she'll fear the answer and panic thinking about it.

 

"Do you think he hates me now?" she finally whispers.

 

She half expected him to laugh, and she's relieved when he doesn't, and instead pulls her head up with a finger under her chin.

 

"Hey, listen to me, cookie," he says in his serious voice, " _No one hates you._  We all love you, Jack loves you, I love you, your mom loves you, your sisters love you, and we always will. Don't you ever doubt that."

 

She wants to look away, pretend she hasn't heard him and hide away inside, but what he tells her isn't nearly as unpleasant as she'd like to pretend and she just nods.

 

"Wanna go back to the party? I mean, it's Jack's birthday, he wants you there."

 

She nods again, but still grips his hand very tight when they stand up to go back downstairs. He squeezes it even tighter and for a second, just for a little while, she feels like everything's all right.


	8. Fall and step back up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Andy trying to deal with failing the police exam.

Sleeping in the same bed has never caused any problem for Andy and April, far from it. They're both cuddlers and, even on hot nights, they like to have even just one arm wrapped around the other person's waist. On cold nights such as this one, they become a big cluster of limbs and hugs and warmth and love. Which is why April notices immediately that Andy's not here when she wakes up shivering that night.

 

She wraps a blanket and a comforter around herself (the blanket Leslie gave them is pretty, but it's also thin, and quite frankly, April thinks she should start dropping hints about that to get her to give them a new one for Christmas), and starts looking around the house. The red numbers on the alarm clock tell her it's 1 am. It's possible that Andy never fell asleep and left the bed to let her rest − a bad calculation, considering she can't sleep well without his big, chubby warmth around her. 

 

"Andy?"

 

April isn't afraid, not at home, not with Andy and Champion to keep her safe, but something about this room feels wrong. The emptiness of it. It's too silent without Andy's breathing when he sleeps next to her, and their home is never silent like this. 

 

She gets up and checks the music room, but no Andy there. Sometimes he gets inspired and writes songs even late at night, with headphones on. You can't control the muse, he says. Truth be told, she didn't expect him to be here. Ever since he failed the police exam, he hasn't written a single song. He hasn't even been singing about the things around him like he always does. April misses his spontaneous jams about chocolate, beer, ice cream, dogs, computers, hamburgers, and most of all, about her, about everything that makes up Andy's life. She misses _him_ , his joyful bubbliness and constant restlessness, and not just because he makes her so happy when he's her sunbeam of warmth, but most importantly because she wants _him_ to be happy.

 

There's no sign of him in the living room either. When she switches the light on, Champion lifts up his head sleepily from where he's been lying on the sofa. 

 

"Hey, pup, have you seen Andy?"

 

A choked sob is the answer − not from Champion, obviously, but in the kitchen. After a gentle pat on Champion's head (the dog goes back to sleep even before she walks away), April takes the small stairs leading to the kitchen and there is Andy. 

 

Sprawled on the tiles, wearing only boxers and one sock, two empty buckets of ice cream next to him, a half-full one near his head with a spoon in his mouth, Andy is a pitiful sight that makes April's heart tighten in her chest.

 

"Andy…"

 

When he looks up to find her staring at him, he lets out a sobbing yelp and turns his back to her, hugging his knees.

 

"I'm a mess!" he groans.

 

He is, but who wouldn't be after failing a test they'd wanted to pass and had trained for for months? She kneels down and rubs his back.

 

"No, babe, no, you're just…" She struggles to find a word that fits but none comes to her mind, none she could tell him. "C'mere."

 

She pulls him by the hips (he's too big to budge with just her strength and none of his will, so it's good he gets the hint) and he begrudgingly sits up. She wraps her arms around him, the blankets around them in a bundle of warmth. Even almost naked on a cold winter night, Andy is boiling. He holds onto her so tight she thinks she might have trouble breathing and sobs against her shoulder. Her top gets wet with his desperation and her heart is heavy with sorrow. It's so rare that Andy is that sad and it's something she feels she's unable to help him with. She just tries her best.

 

"It's alright," she whispers, rubbing his back with as much love as she can, like he always does her, "It's alright."

 

"I'm… _sniff_ … I'm such a _failure_ ," he sobs.

 

"Shh, no, you're not, you're amazing."

 

She threads her fingers through his sweaty hair, massaging his scalp like he's always liked. His chest is heaving with his crying and April feels completely helpless. How often has this been the other way around, April being sad or upset or anxious and Andy comforting her. What kind of wife is she if she can't even pay that back? 

 

"Shh, you're fine, it's all fine," she whispers against his ear.

 

"I really thought… I thought I'd been good."

 

"You _are_ good, babe, you're the best…"

 

"You should just get back with Derek and Ben and have the life you deserve!"

 

She would snort if she wasn't so heartbroken.

 

"God, Andy, they were assholes, and I broke up with them cause _I wanted to be with you_! I love you, babe."

 

"But you deserve so much more!"

 

She sighs, if just out of frustration and sadness.

 

"Babe, look at me."

 

Slowly, he lifts up his head from her shoulder. His cheeks are still wet with tears he doesn't even bother to wipe away. She does it for him with her thumbs, holding his face in her hands, stroking his skin softly. His eyes are red and puffy.

 

"Andy?"

 

"Yeah?"

 

He tries to at least sound less desperate and gone than he is.

 

"You're amazing. You're the best. By far. In the universe, in all universes. You're the best husband I could have hoped for, you're kind and amazing and super hot and perfect, and I love you more than anything else."

 

He looks like he might burst into tears again any second, but then, Andy is very emotional when she opens up, even when he feels fine.

 

"But I'm such a failure…" he tries to say.

 

A single tear rolls down his cheek and April rubs it away.

 

"No, you're not. You failed one exam. _You_ are great. They're the ones who suck."

 

"What? No they don't!"

 

"They do! If they don't want you, they suck."

 

As she says that, she catches the hint of the classic Andy Dwyer sparkle in his eyes. Progress.

 

"Besides, why be a cop anyway? Cops are bastards. Look at Leslie's ex, he was such a loser."

 

At that, he chuckles. Just one huff of breathing that's a bit louder than the rest, but it's warm and fluffy and perfect. She lifts up an arm to open the snack drawer above their heads and pulls out the first thing that she sets her fingers on, a bag of candy. She offers him the first pick to cheer him up.

 

"Thanks."

 

She takes a candy herself, a sour one, her favorites.

 

"Also, you still have Burt Macklin."

 

"Burt Macklin _is_ a bastard," he says, rubbing his chin.

 

"A sexy bastard."

 

And there it is, the signature Andy smile that can make any day feel brighter even when all the rest is shitty. He chews on his candy (a banana flavored one, his favorite), thoughtful. His arms are still around her and she feels like she might just fall asleep again. That is, until the cold nose of their three-legged wonder finds its way against her elbow, wanting in on the cuddling.

 

"Look who loves you and wants to be with you!" She says and pulls Champion between them.

 

Andy kisses the dog's head and Champion licks his face in that way that always makes Andy giggle − and today is no exception. They remain there for a while, all three of them in their cocoon of love, their little family, until Andy breaks the silence.

 

"So you're sure you're not ashamed of me?"

 

"I'm _proud_ of you. You had a goal, and you gave it your best shot. They're the dumb ones."

 

"I just… Ugh," he rubs his eyes, probably feeling new tears coming. "I just wanted to get a good job for you."

 

"Well, here's a good job for me: you're gonna keep being the best husband in the world, okay?"

 

He chuckles, but his eyes are still sad.

 

"I mean, I can do that, but what about the money? I wanted to get money and, like, buy you stuff."

 

"God, babe, I don't care about money. If you really want money, you can always steal some from Jerry or Ben."

 

"You're sure?"

 

She kisses him, holding his face close, trying to make him understand that _he_ is the only thing that matters. His lips are sweet with sugar and angst.

 

"Dead sure. They always leave their stuff by their desk when they're having lunch."

 

"And then I can buy you stuff."

 

"And we can always steal my dad's stuff, too."

 

"Aww, babe."

 

He hugs her tight and kisses her cheeks and neck all over, like a big loving bear. He's still sniffing a little bit, but overall, she thinks she's managed the crisis.

 

"I love you so much, babe," he whispers.

 

"Love you too."

 

And she knows they'll get through this, like they have gotten through everything before, and like they'll go through everything in the future. This is just another step of life, an angsty passage in their book which is generally very, very happy. 

 

"Wanna go back to bed?" she asks and he nods, not before taking a handful of candy for the road. 

 

They carry Champion back to the sofa and go back to bed, and this time, April is the big spoon, and Andy's light snoring soon soothes her back to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, if you read this and enjoyed it, consider leaving a comment to tell me what you liked :) It really means the world to get feedback.


	9. How To Entertain Your Kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Andy's movie reenactment night for the Ludgate-Dwyer family.

Some nights, though less and less, April wonders how she ended up a mother of five, most of her kids loud and goofy, and asks herself what her fifteen year old self would have thought. She mostly hates her fifteen year old self and wants to shake her up and get some sense into her. Her fifteen year old self was a goth, a ridiculous one, and thought knowing a lot about cemetery traditions around the world was a replacement for social life.

 

Tonight is not one of these nights. She's too busy being happy.

 

She doesn't regret anything at all, not one second, and especially not on nights like tonight. She's lying on the couch, her legs on Roberta's lap, who is getting tired as well, her head on her hands, slouched forward. The twins, like all toddlers when asked to pay attention for more than ten seconds, have fallen asleep above her. Their warm little bodies are curled up around each other and their quiet little snoring is adorable − they certainly got that from Andy's side. Jack is sitting on the floor, wrapped in a blanket, and leans back into her touch when she strokes the hair at his nape that's curling, just like his father. Samantha is crouching on her armchair as she always does and her brown eyes are big and bright with excitement.

 

And Andy, well, Andy's giving a performance tonight. A very special performance, a treat that they all always enjoy. Nights like these almost always start the same way: power outage. Sometimes Andy pretends there was one and switches off all the lights in the house, and the kids are too young or too excited to care. Sometimes there really is one and they have fun lighting candles and setting them in funny patterns on the coffee table. The result is the same anyway: Andy's special movie reenactment nights. Tonight's program is _How to Train Your Dragon_. They've reached the part where Hiccup is supposed to prove he is a true Viking. 

"I'm not one of them," he says solemnly in Hiccup's teenage voice and takes off the salad bowl he's been wearing as a helmet.They've seen the movie — Andy version or not, it's one of his favorites to reenact — countless times, but the kids still hold their breath when Toothless comes to the rescue and gets captured (usually, Andy plays this scene as the dragon struggling and fighting till the very end, but tonight he's playing one of the Vikings trapping the beast — in Andy's case, an armchair cushion). April still laughs whenever he does Stoick's ridiculous accent and for a second, she's afraid the girls are going to wake up from her body shaking, but they sleep through it all.

 

They sail to the Nest, Andy looking straight ahead solemnly, Astrid giving hope to Hiccup (Andy plays an _amazing_ teenage girl), and then the teenagers' race to the Nest where he nudges against the kids, pretending to be a dragon himself. Robbie cheers excitedly, shoving popcorn down her throat (Popcorn is, after all, one of her middle names). She knows all the lines by heart. 

 

The epic battle couldn't be more epic if Andy tried. He is shouting, gnashing, pommeling, and April is always afraid the neighbors are going to interrupt such a great moment, but they don't (not tonight, at least). Sam still gasps when Hiccup falls, hiding but not quite hiding her eyes behind her fingers. But she stares with a passion when Andy-Hiccup wakes up the next morning short of a leg. And giggles by the time he punches himself like Astrid Hiccup. He hums the music of the credits, and the movie reenactment night is over.

 

"Okay, my li'l dragons, now you're going to bed!" 

 

He picks up the twins, one in each arm, and they naturally nuzzle against his chest without even waking up. 

 

"That means you too, monsters," April says.

 

"Aww, already?" Robbie whines, but she's not the kind of kid to really make a fuss, so she takes Sir Fluffy-Pants with her, gives a big goodnight hug to April and takes Sam's hand to go to their room together. 

 

"Jack?" April asks as her big boy doesn't get up. 

 

He throws his head back, looking at her upside-down, and his eyes are a little red. She slides down the couch, sitting next to him on the carpet, and wraps an arm around his shoulder. He leans against her quietly. 

 

"What's wrong, bug?" 

 

"I miss Champion."

 

Oh. Of all the kids, Jack is the only one who really remembers Champion. He was almost in kindergarten when they lost him (at least their puppy had a long and meaningful life), and he still talks about him sometimes. April thinks about her pet, how he begged for cuddles and how he learned to bring them his leash every day around the same time, how he loved running, playing catch, playing with dead leaves. She remembers how he would put his front leg on Jack's shoulder and they would dance, or so it seemed. He was always ever so kind and sweet with their baby, even though he was their baby first. He was a really good dog. 

 

"I miss him too," she whispers, like a secret, and he turns to give her a hug. 

 

"Okay, all the girls are in bed, where's… Oh there you, buddy!" Andy interrupts, but notices that Jack's cheeks are wet. "Hey, what's wrong?"

 

"We were thinking about Champion," April says. 

 

"Oh, right…" 

 

In a few large steps, he's picking both of them up to pull them on his laps and his arms surround them, warm and comfortable. 

 

"I was thinking about him, actually, that's why I picked this movie."

 

"It's a beautiful movie," Jack says, rubbing his eyes. He hates crying, even though Andy has told him thousands of times that it's totally okay. 

 

"At least Count Chocula isn't that bad of a dog, right?" 

 

In fact, their giant of a puppy has been a great addition to the family, though all dogs are different and he is nothing like Champion. 

 

"You're gonna be okay, baby?" April asks.

 

Jack nods and shimmies his way out of their arms. He leans down to give both of them a kiss goodnight, and leaves the room quietly. 

 

"That was a really good movie night," April says eventually. She's still sitting on Andy's lap, and she could stay here all night, but he decides to stand up and carries her with him. 

 

"It's time for bed, babe," he says and she can hear the smile on his lips. 

 

"Yeah, but not for us!"

 

He does put her down so she can give a goodnight kiss to her daughters, at least, and he still has to sing the goodnight song. He gives a special shoutout to all the great three-legged pets in the world, such a great song that even April has to clap when it's over. And when they do go to bed later that night, her dreams are filled with her old white and dog puppy that was such a perfect companion for so many years. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you read this and enjoyed it, consider leaving a comment to tell me what you liked :) It really means the world to get feedback and it just takes a few seconds for you. You don't need an AO3 account to leave kudos or post a comment.


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